June 11, 2018 Monday

I woke up at around 2:00 AM to pee for the nth time that night and I can’t go back to sleep anymore. A lot of thoughts have been bugging me but the biggest concern that I had that time was my excitement to see my baby girl. I was already 38 weeks and 6 days pregnant that day and I had news that my baby’s amniotic fluid is getting low. I thought I was going to be induced last weekend but my Doctor decided to wait a little longer so I can go through active labor to reduce the chance of getting a C section. I honestly do not care anymore whether I go through a C section or normal delivery that time. All I wanted was to see my baby healthy and to make sure that she’s still safe. My doctor told me though that my fluid was still enough for my baby so I took her words and went home to wait for the right time. I trust my doctor but I was still worried. All the news I’ve been hearing about people giving birth to stillborn babies are driving me crazy. I remained calm however with every kick coming from my baby, like giving me an assurance that she’s okay and that there’s really nothing to worry about. ❤

Was I scared about the horrible pain I might experience when I give birth? My pain tolerance had always been low. I used to cry when on needle shots so I had always been scared with the thought lf giving birth before I got married. Surprisingly, at barely 2 weeks before my due date.. I wasn’t scared about the pain. I was just scared of losing my precious baby so I don’t really mind anymore if they have to cut me open, stitched and stretched out. All I was feeling that wee hours was excitement so I prayed. I asked God’s guidance and honestly, I also sked him to let Allyka come a little sooner because I was already getting tired of being pregnant. I was tired of not being able to eat what I want. Tired of having the need to go to the bathroom every hour. Tired of having difficulty to find the perfect sleeping position. Tired of waiting. All I wanted was to see my baby and the pain I need to go through didn’t really bother me.

I was able to sleep at around 3 am and woke up at 4:30 am when I felt/heard something unplugged down there followed by water leaking. I knew it was my mucuous plug because I’ve already read so much about pregnancy and giving birth. I immediately told my husband about it and called my doctor who told me to go to the hospital right away.

We arrived at the hospital at 5 am feeling excited and not worried at all (since I was still not experiencing any contractions).Nakapag selfie pa si buntis kasi wala pang contractions 😂

We went straight to the Emergency and gave them my admitting slip which my doctor gave me before. They examined me and told me that I will be induced since my water bag already broke but my cervix was just 1cm dilated. They brought me to the labor room where the pain started thanks to whatever they had to inject on my dextrose to jump start the labor.

I came in smiling and went out of the labor room cursing due to the pain (not too loud though). They brought me to my room where Allan was waiting. This is where I would spend the next few hours until I’m ready to give birth. Allan was there calling people, supporting me and the nerve even asked me if he could sleep while I’m experiencing contractions 😂😤😡 Our doctor told us that first time moms who give birth usually go through longer hours of labor pain so my innocent husband was expecting me to give birth the next day 😑😠😭 I looked at him sharply and needless to say, he wasn’t allowed to sleep while I go through hell.

All their stories were right about going through labor. It felt like my body was being cut in half. Felt like the worst dysmenorrhea x 1000. The pain is undescribable and I kept quiet all the time. I was trying hard to follow the nurse’s instruction to breath in and out when I feel contractions. I distrcated myself by lookinh outside where it was raining hard. I held Allan’s hands tightly like I want to break iy apart. I held the bed railings tightly like my life depended on it. I slept in between contractions even if it was just for a minute or two. I did my best. I didn’t cry but deep inside I already feel like demanding to be cut (c section) so I can just get my baby out and stop the pain. I reallt almost did that until we (Allan, I and the nurse) were surprised to find out that my cervix  was already 7cm dilated at 10am. I can’t believe they were already bringing me to the labor room and that my baby’s almost ready to go out. This time around they were already telling me not to push which was difficult since I feel like my body is pushing on its own. Now the problem was my doctor who was already on her way to the hospital was stuck in traffic since all other areas are flooded since. She arrived at around noon but my baby’s not yet ready to come out apparently. My tummy’s still high so the nurses had to push my baby out. It was difficult. I had difficulty pushing but I listened to what my doctor told me ans tried hard to follow despite the intense pain I was feeling. After a few more attempts, my baby’s out!

Feeling dizzy,my first words were ‘Thank you po! Kamusta na po ang anak ko? Bakit hindi po siya umiiyak?”.

Then I heard her cry and right after that, I fell asleep due to sedatives. They made me sleep.

I woke up in the recovery room where my husband and my nanay told me I did great and my baby’s so cute. They showed me this photo and I almost cried. She’s too precious and beautiful 😍

It wasn’t until the evening when my baby was brought to our private room so I can breastfeed her. Allyka had to be observed at the NICU due to cord coil and she also ran out of amniotic fluid. I almost had a c section but thank God I was able to deliver her safely. Kudos to my doctor too who never gave me a hint about my situation while I was on active labor. She just kept on motivating me and telling me that I’m doing a great job. I would have panic if I found out about our situation.

I know it doesn’t sound ideal because there’s no unang yakap, immediate rooming in and all but I still consider this day as the most magical day of my life. It was love at first sight. Holding her for the first time is such an amazing experience.

Today is my Allyka Faith’s first birthday but not only am I celebrating the miracle of her life, I’m also celebrating my one yeat of motherhood. Indeed, the best year of my life. ❤

Thank you for taking the time to read our story. Please follow me on Instagram @mommyerikajane for more motherhood stories. ❤